Andrew and I generally keep open a chat window during the day, as we’re both online for most of the day (no, his employer doesn’t care). Sometimes, we share amusing or interesting spam titles that turn up in our spam filters. This is a conversation we had today on that very topic.

HE: The most passionate lovers are the men with big hoses.
ME: Firemen?
HE: You heard it here first, folks. Sexy firemen.
ME: Or gardeners?
HE: Firemen have bigger hoses.
ME: Some gardeners have big hoses. How do you know so much about the size of hoses, anyway? The gardeners at the Royal Botanical Gardens have very big hoses, indeed.
HE: They’re mostly buried, I’d think. Actually, no. They would be pipes. Firemen’s hoses are much thicker when they’re working.
ME: Andrew… is there something you want to tell me?
HE: Yes, honey. I’ve seen a fireman’s hose. I’ve even touched one.

Can you see why we’ve been together as long as we have? Also, I’m jealous. I’ve never touched a fireman’s hose…

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