A Mother enters her daughters bedroom and sees a letter on the bed. With the worst premonition, she reads it, with trembling hands:
Dear Mom,
It is with great regret and sorrow that I’m telling you that I eloped with my new boyfriend. I found real passion and he is so nice, with all his piercings and tattoos and his big motorcycle. But it’s not only that Mom, I’m pregnant and Cletus said that we will be very happy in his trailer in the woods. He also wants to have many more children with me, and that’s one of my dreams.
I’ve learned that marijuana doesn’t hurt anyone and we’ll be growing it for us and his friends, who are providing us with all the cocaine and ecstasy we may want.
In the meantime, we’ll pray for science to find the AIDS cure and for Cletus to get better, he deserves it.
Don’t worry Mom, I’m 15 years old now and I know how to take care of myself. Some day I’ll visit you so you can know your grandchildren.
Love,
Judith
P.S. Mom, it’s not true, I’m at the neighbor’s house. I just wanted to show you that there are worse things in life than the school’s report card that’s in my desk drawer….. I love you Mom.
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